when cold feels hot

Have you ever had really cold hands?  

Maybe you just came in from outside and you were touching snow with your bare hands.  Then you go to wash them and the water feels so tingly hot.  But then you wash up your arm a little ways and you notice that the water is really very cold.  

It just feels hot on your cold hands.

This happens to me everyday.  I have perpetually cold hands, so I’m always testing the water up on my arm to find out what the temperature really is.  Because I can’t trust my hands.  My hand perception isn’t trustworthy.

This got me thinking.

I wonder what other perceptions I have that I shouldn’t be trusting.  What head perceptions do I need to check on my arm to make sure I know what’s real?  Of course, I wouldn’t really check my arm, instead I’d run it by Mr. TommyD or a good friend.

What perceptions that I have about people are wrong?  about sin?  Maybe I think someone doesn’t like me.  I think they’re cold towards me, but really they’re warm.  Or maybe I have become so accustomed to certain sins that I don’t even feel them as cold.  

This is just one of many reasons I’m really happy to be married.  I’ve got someone there to check my perception v. reality meter.  Of course, God’s Word and the Holy Spirit are the ultimate reality check-ers.  Because they show us True Reality.  And that’s why it’s incredibly dangerous for me (or anyone) to get away from Scripture.  It is the one constant in culture of change.  

It cuts through perception to reveal timeless and timely Reality.  Without it I go adrift in my own perception.  

The Word gives me Christ.  

And Christ is Real.

8 hours of screen time

Whoa-ser.  A new study shows that Americans spend 8 hours a day in front of a screen.

This includes tv, computer screens, cellphones and other devices.  That’s a lot.  But if your job is to work on a computer it isn’t quite so much.  8 hours would be minimum for the workday, then throw in a tv show or two and cell phone texts etc,  and that person is up to 10 hrs.

Not to mention if you have a blog.  That can definitely up your screen time. 

The study said that over 5 hrs of the 8 are spent watching tv.  5 hours watching tv per day.  Hmmm, they’re missing a lot of good shows.  

Just kidding!  That’s a joke I heard; thought I’d pass it on. 

Seriously though, I try to limit my time on this here computer.  (Even though it is a mac and I really like it!)  The things that bring me in front of the screen most regularly are: facebook, this blog, checking drudge and reading news, emailing and reading or watching sermons.  I know I could just listen to the sermons, but sometimes I like watching them or reading them.

My other contributor to screen time is watching the shows Lost and American Idol.  I know they often air at the same time, in which case I defer to Lost.  I don’t DVR American Idol because usually after it airs I’m not all that interested anymore.

And we don’t have a DVR. :)

There’s my contribution to the “8 hours of screen time.”  What are yours?  

*You need not qualify your answer by telling me how small the amount of screen time actually is.  I know.  You are barely ever in front of a screen.  You hardly contribute at all, except… fill in the blank.  I’ll assume you use great discretion and are very godly in your screening limitation.  Unless you aren’t, in which case I’ll let the Spirit convict as it will.

the only organizational tip you’ll ever need!

Of course, that’s not entirely true, but it sure makes a good headline!

I got this tip at my MOMS group.  A lady was giving an introduction (she wasn’t even the main speaker) and happened to mention a tip she’d heard from someone else that had always stuck with her.  Well, now it’s stuck with me, too.

So brace yourselves, here is The Only Organizational Tip You’ll Ever Need! (or TOOTYEN! for short):

“Put things away in the hard place.”

 You might be thinking?  What?  That’s it?  What does that even mean?  All it means is that when your picking up your house or re-organizing a closet, or whatever, that you put everything away in its hardest and final destination.  

So, let’s say I just folded a load of laundry.  Instead of setting the basket of folded clothes on the bed to be put away later, just go ahead and immediately put it in its hardest place (i.e. the actual drawers).

Or, I need to take some bills down to Tom’s office.  Instead of moving them from the desk to the counter (because the counter is closer to his office than the desk), just take them all the way down to his office.

Putting things in the hard place right away eliminates clutter and chaos.  Of course, we all know that one of the reasons things don’t get put all the way away is because we’re busy, we get interrupted, etc.  

But I’ve found that even when I’m not being interrupted I sometimes still will only do half of a job.  So this little phrase helps remind me to put things all the way away. 

It’s also helpful because some things don’t yet have an “away” spot.  So I might be staring at stack of misc. stuff and think, “There’s no place for this.”  Then I have to make a place for it.  And not just shove it somewhere so that I don’t have to look at the pile.  Put it in the hard place.  A place that that misc stuff can call its home.  A final destination.

The final destination might be the trash can or the Goodwill store.

A tidbit about me: I’m not enamored with organization.  I take no particular delight in tubs and label makers.  But I do loathe clutter and chaos.  So, this is my one and only organizational tip.  

I must say, it works pretty well.

For someone who really cares about organization and “best practices” in all areas of life, check out Matt Perman’s What’s Best Next.  He’s got some great articles.  Only don’t forget this one jewel that I’ve offered!  Put things in the hard place!

Do you have any tips to share?

news and reviews 3/21

Oversight Leads to Envy 

No one needs incentive to sin.  It comes naturally.  Yet, it seems that we are being given plenty of envy incentive nowadays with the oversight of executive pay for banks and wall street firms.  As the gov’t increases “oversight” and makes sure to trumpet and disdain the amount of money execs make, the message is not all that subtle.  We should be mad at execs for being wealthy.  We deserve what they have.  We want more of what isn’t ours.  We’re coveters.  

In this environment envy has become a virtue instead of a vice. 

YouTube Diplomacy?

During the campaign many of us were outraged when Sen. Obama said he would talk to our enemies, including Iran, without preconditions.  I’m not sure whether sending them a video-message qualifies as that, but it seems Iran is less than enthusiastic about talking with us.  Their response to President Obama was something along the lines of, “Call us once you’ve rewritten the American Foreign Policy, then we might consider talking with you.”  

Not only are they spitting in our “out-stretched hand,” they fist remains firmly clenched as they redouble their nuclear efforts.

Baby Born on Flight to New Zealand, Left in Bathroom

“We are relieved to have been informed that both mother and child are reunited..” said the airline.  Does this seem strange to anyone else?  Mother gives birth secretly in airport bathroom.  Mother puts alive baby in waste bin receptacle.  Mother leaves baby and is later spotted in line for immigration.  Now mother is reunited with the baby she threw away?  The word “relieved” is not my first inclination.  More like “scared.”  What will she do with the baby this time?

Christian Book Awards

I was pleased with two of the winners of the Christian Book Awards.  Although, frankly, I put zero stock in such things.  The ESV Study Bible won its category and Spectacular Sins by Pastor John (Piper) did as well.  I just got the ESV Study Bible for my b-day; I’m liking it quite a bit.  I’ve been using the online version during the month of March, because it’s free.  

And Spectacular Sins is probably in my top 5 of Pastor John’s books.  

Undo that ‘Send’!

Phew!  Ever accidently hit ‘send’ on an email that wasn’t ready?  Or maybe hastily written something not-so-nice that you at once wish you could take back?  Well, google’s got your back with their new “undo send” feature.  

I don’t know how google does all the stuff they do, so I will say it now: they totally freak me out.  I think they know more about me than I do.  If ever a one world order comes about I’ve no doubt it will be called “Google World.”  I wonder what they do with all those emails that get “undo send”-ed?  

Keep them for blackmail I’ll bet.

ageism: a new word for an old problem

I’ve got age on my mind.  

Here are some contributing factors: yesterday was my 28th birthday; Tim Challies posted on ageism; I recently met some delightful elderly ladies at church that made me reflect on what it would be like to have outlived your husband and have grown children far-away.

So here are my raw 28-year-old (probably immature) thoughts on age:

1) Ages 30-65 sound great.  I’m looking forward to being all those ages.  Any older than that, I get nervous about whether I’ll be useful and/or if I’ll be alone.  

2) Once people hit a certain age (it’s different for everyone, depending on how slowly or quickly they age) many younger people cease to see them as people.   When they look at them they just see “old.”

3) Cultivating relationships between the elderly and children is vital for both parties.  

4) Cultivating relationships between middle-aged people and the elderly is also vital.

5) How I treat the elderly people around me, and how I take care of my parents when they age, will probably determine how my kids take care of me someday.  (And I really don’t want to be in a nursing home, alone.)

6) The pressure on the elderly to stay “independent” is ridiculous.  Even if they are independent, why not move them in with family so that they don’t have to be alone?  

7) Dementia must be a horribly scary thing to face.  I hope and pray I never have to do it.  

8) Youth has been extended to complete silliness (from the teens to the 20′s, now even the 30′s).  By rights, I should still be single and discovering myself.  Instead I’ve been married for coming on 7 years and have three children.  I feel blessed, not bitter.

9)  Youth is often wasted with self-indulgence.  Why must youth be synonymous with self-focus?  The time when bodies and minds are at their peak should be the time of the greatest physical and mental service to the body of Christ.  Youth should be useful too.

10) Age and wisdom do not always go hand in hand, but we should generally assume that they do, and young people should be taught to listen listen listen to the elderly around them.

11) I fear for the elderly in our society.  A nation that doesn’t value life at its beginning will not value it at its ending.  History proves this.  And I think nationalizing health care will be a step toward limiting the amount of care that will be deemed worthy for elderly to receive.

I’m thankful for shining examples of godly service-minded youth and for shining examples of godly gracious and wise elderly around me.  I pray that as I age, wisdom will increase and that as my children grow, youth will be an opportunity for service, not self-indulgence.

so, what are you good at?

Over at 22 Words, Abraham’s post is titled, “What are you better at than other people?…Now you know what you should do for them.”  And here are his ever-brief 22 words:

It’s arrogant to revel in your superiority.

But that’s different than reveling in the opportunity your superiority gives you to serve others.

And so, I’d like to know.  What are you gifted at?  If it eases your way to telling me, I’ll give you a few things I’m good at: having people over, encouraging people (usually my kids nowadays), and gulping large amounts of information.

I don’t have any delusions of grandeur when I say those things.  For all things are from him and through him and to him.  He is over all things and in him all things hold together.  He gets the glory for any giftings I have.  

Same goes for you!  So go ahead and let us know what gifts the Creator has been pleased to bestow on you.

Do you use your gifts for the good of the Body?  

And if you’re a regular reader over at 22 Words, but don’t like commenting there because there are just too many comments, feel free to share here, in this more intimate setting. :)

some good and not-so-good reasons to memorize fighter verses

We memorize fighter verses at church.  They’re just sets of verses that take us through the year.  For more info on them check out my “I recommend” page.  Also this week’s fighter verse (and every week’s) can be found and meditated on at fighterverses.com.  Here’s this week’s:

I will bless the LORD at all times; his praise shall continually be in my mouth. My soul makes its boast in the LORD; let the humble hear and be glad. Oh, magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt his name together!  Psalm 34:1-3

I encourage everyone to memorize the fighter verses.  Or memorize Scripture according to whatever plan you have set up for yourself.  It’s beneficial.  

That said, the heart is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked.  Who can know it?  So, even something like memorizing the Bible can be done with the wrong motives.  Here’s some examples of good and not-so-good reasons to memorize fighter verses:

no-so-good: I learned the fighter verse because I wanted to be called on Sunday morning to recite it and show everyone how holy I am.  

good: I learned the fighter verse because I wanted to be called on Sunday morning to recite it and encourage my brothers and sisters in Christ with the Word of God on my lips.

not-so-good:  I learned the fighter verse so I could recite it Sunday morning in the hopes that one of the pastoral staff would recognize me and congratulate me for my job well done.

good: I learned the fighter verse so I could recite it Sunday morning and one of the pastoral staff could point to me and say, “If Abigail (low brain function) can do it, then you can too!” and encourage others in their goals.  

not-so-good: I learned the fighter verse and taught it to my children so they could recite it Sunday morning (and on cue everywhere else) to show everyone what a good parent I am.

good: I learned the fighter verse and taught it to my children so that God’s Word would be in their mind and hopefully make its way to their heart.  

not-so-good: I learned the fighter verse so that next time I see “so and so” I can slap them up side the head with it.  They are always boasting and this week’s verse is about that.  They definitely need to work on that area of their life.  Plus, they’ll see how holy I am.

good:  I learned the fighter verse so that with humility, I can begin to look at the wickedness of my own heart through the lens of Scripture.  

Of course, in order to come up with these reasons, you can safely assume that I’ve had inklings towards all of them.  Even if subconscious at times.  I’m not sure the human race is capable of a motive that is 100% pure.  

But even if your motives are wrong or partly wrong and you’re working on making them pure, keep memorizing.  When I was a child in AWANA, I guarantee you my motives had nothing to do with putting God’s Word in my heart.

They had to do with winning.  I was ultra competitive.  I wanted to say more verses than anyone else and I wanted my team to win.  Memorizing verses was a means to winning.  Yet, God in His grace has not let His Word return void in my life.  

The foundation of verses stored up in my mind as a child have made their way to my heart.  And I am exceedingly grateful that they are there.  And I long to add to them.  Maybe you’ll consider what God might do through Scripture memory in your life?

the cute stuff

I need a break from the normal stuff I usually post.  So here’s some cute stuff from my children.  I’ll spare you the not-so-cute stuff.  

 

Me: Daddy’s gonna be home in five minutes kids!

Eliza: We better get busy.  This place is a mess!

***

Me: Seth, did you get hurt?

Seth: Yes (pointing to the blood on his leg), the jelly squeezed out of me.

***

Seth: Please play this with me Eliza.

Eliza: I’m just not into that, Seth.

***

Eliza: Mommy, Seth has to sleep all alone in his room.

Me: Yes, he does.

Eliza: I get to sleep with Elianna.  So we get to be together and love each other.

Me: That’s right.

Eliza: We need to have a baby brother so Seth doesn’t have to be alone.

***

Elianna: Up, Mommy, up.

Me: Should we get some lunch?

Elianna: Apes! apes! (grapes).

I know I’m forgetting a couple really cute ones, but my brain is mush.  I should have jotted them down right away.  Next time.

What cute conversations have you been having lately?  Feel free to keep the whiny ones to yourself. :)

confession and prayer, part 1

Do you have a hard time confessing your sin?

I think we have four main responses when it comes to the questions: “How are you doing?  Are you struggling in any areas?  How can I pray for you? 

We either 1) give a flat, “Nope, I’m good,” 2) we give a token confession 3) we change the subject or, 4) we really answer the questions with life-sharing and confession.  

In the first case of complete denial, maybe we’re thinking, as the Lord brings to mind something worth confessing, “I confess it to you Lord, after all, it’s against you and you alone that I have sinned; why bother bringing these folks into it?  Why do they need to know that I’ve been a big complainer lately?”

I am guilty of this.

Or, we give a token confession.  When faced with intruding questions we might say, “I’m pretty good but I’ve been having a hard time keeping my sock drawer organized. (That’s a token confession; it’s of secondary importance.)

Or, we do the classic change of subject and say, “Oh yes, please pray for my uncle’s wife’s sister who will be traveling over Easter.” (While that may be valid, it’s still a dodge.)

The command to, “confess your sins to one another, and pray for each other,” is for our good.  Yet, even though I know this, pride and self-protection can get in my way.  Pride is simple and poisonous.  It says, “I care more about appearing good to these people than about obeying God and doing what He says is good for me.” 

And self-protection (which is more my problem) says, “They won’t understand; they’ll judge me instead of love me.  They’ll gossip about me.”  I would say a certain degree of self-protection is wise.  We should pick trustworthy Christians to confess our sin to.  But if this is established, the excuses become just that, excuses.

Also, the more protective we are of ourselves in sharing with others, the more protective the people around us will be of themselves.  If my big problem is that I can’t get my socks in good working order, then the person next to me may have trouble admitting they can’t seem to get their life in working order.

God’s been working on this area of my life.  What was a normal part of life in HS and college became uncomfortable and hard with the unfamiliar friends that go along with big life changes.  My husband has been a good example.  And I’m blessed to have people around me who make this seem easier and more routine.  

And God isn’t looking down in disgust at our sin laid out.  He already knows it all and He paid the price for it.  It’s a done deal.  I’m His and Christ has finished the work of sin payment.  So when He sees us confessing to one another, He sees obedient children doing what is good for their soul.

Next time I want to look at the fourth response, and, the essential place of prayer.

why generalizations about depression aren’t helpful, generally speaking

I have a love and burden for God’s people who are depressed and sorrowing.  

God has also worked in me to give me a love and burden for His people who don’t seem to “get” sorrow.  Christians should be the most tender-hearted, loving, encouraging people toward one another the world has ever seen.  And I long to see His people (and myself) do this.

But, sometimes instead of helping the sorrowing to make their calling and election sure; to encourage them as long as it is called today; to continually pray for all the saints; we say things with arrogance that wound Christ’s own body.

 Here’s a few hurtful generalizations/assumptions I’ve heard said to people belonging to Christ.  And also, my responses to them:

1) Depression is made-up.  Nobody had depression 2,ooo years ago.  

A: To that I say, look to the Psalms or Lamentations or Ecclesiastes or the Minor Prophets or Jesus plight in the Garden or Job.  No, the parallels aren’t perfect, but the Bible is rich with examples of God’s people in great sorrow.  The lesson from Scripture is to comfort.  They will know we are Christians by our love for one another.  

2) Depression is a generational sin.  You may call it genetic, but I think it’s the sins of the father’s being passed down.

A: I don’t think it’s any more generational sin than high blood pressure is.  But certainly the blind man that the disciples asked about comes to mind when assuming generational sin.  Is our view of God big enough to believe that he may cause depression for His glory, the way He caused blindness for His glory?  And, if you belong to Christ, you are no longer a slave to the law of sin and death, but to Christ.  

[Add-on: Providentially, my pastor just posted on this very topic!]

3) Depression itself isn’t a sin, but taking anti-depressants is a crutch that takes you away from reliance on God.

A: I think that anti-depressants are part of God’s common grace to mankind.  I’ve yet to meet a Christian who takes them and, as a result, has been pulled away from God or reliance on God.  When they are viewed as a means of grace, the depressed person’s affections and thankfulness to the Lord is increased and they are humbled.  And from this humility reliance on Him may grow.

4) The Bible is all-sufficient for life and Godliness, not the Bible and anti-depressants.

A: We don’t tell women suffering with low thyroid that their tiredness is really just idle laziness and that the Bible is sufficient for them to live a more godly life.  We are compassionate with them as fellow sisters and laborers for the Lord.  

We tell them to take thyroid medication to change the balance of the hormone.  We don’t admonish them as idle, though they seem totally healthy.  And the Bible is completely and utterly sufficient to help guide them (or the depressed person taking medication) through that part of their life and reveal true Godliness to them.  

5) Depression means you don’t believe God and His Word.  If you did, you wouldn’t be depressed… it’s Good News, after all!  You just aren’t reading the Bible enough.

A: Reading the Bible is sometimes the only thing a sorrowing person can do, along with whispering desperate prayers and hoping that others whisper them on their behalf.  The depth of Biblical wisdom and love of Scripture I have found in depressed Christians is great.  And often their depression does not push them from God, but opens their eyes to the reality that God holds them, apart from works or will.

I may be preaching to the choir with all these posts about sorrow.  But here’s the point: smug remarks about depression and prozac are one sure way to drive a fellow brother or sister in Christ to silence, or worse yet, drive them right out the door.  

And so I will continue to plead for the lowly: take care with them!  It’s what Christians do!