biblical naming score card

Do your kids have Bible names?  I have one.  And one of our kids does.  The other two have “Hebrew” names.  I’m guessing no extra points for that.  

I about fell off my chair laughing when I first read this.  However, I read it late at night and my humor-o-meter may have been off.  In other words, if you don’t find it funny, I won’t blame you.  But you really should loosen up.  

The Crazy Bible Name for Your Kid Score Sheet

1. You give your kid a name that doesn’t sound Biblical except for a slight letter difference that only Christians would notice, e.g. “Rebekah” with a k. = +1 point

2. Major prophets. = +1 point

3. Minor prophets.= +3 points

4. You give your kid a name that starts of kind off normal but then takes a sharp right turn into the Old Testament. Like “Anthothijah.” Starts off like you’re going to say Anthony but just before you get to the “ny” you throw a “thijah” at me. Well played. = +3 points

5. You name a kid without looking up the meaning of the name first. Mordecai for instance means “Servant of Marduk.” Good luck telling a three-year old what that means. = +4 points

6. Their middle name is Matthew, Mark, Luke or John = +1 point

7. Their first name is “The gospel of” = +5 points

8. Their name prepares them up for an obscure career. Agrippa for instance means, “tamer of wild horses.” = +2 points

9. You name them after a character that started out great but ended up kind of blowing it. Saul for instance. = +1 point

10. You name them after one of the 12 tribes. = +1 point

11. You name them after all of the 12 tribes. +5 points

12. Their name can easily be turned into a brutal nickname. Zechariah** for instance would become “Diarrhea” on the playground in about 2.4 seconds. = +2 points

13. You find a way to name your kid after the Bible and the movie Star Wars. Obadiah for instance. If you name your kid that but call him Obi, well done. =+10 points

14. You use the name as a witnessing tool, with the hope that every time your non believing family members say it out loud they will perhaps be reminded of 1 Chronicles 2:8 and eventually become Christians. = +3 points

15. You name your kid Jonathan or David and then are secretly disappointed when as a toddler they exhibit little affinity for any sort of weapons play or giant head cutting off. = +2 points.

How did you score? High? Low? What categories did I miss? We already covered the Christian penchant for naming kids after Lord of the Rings. Did you give your kid a Biblical name? Do you have one yourself? What names have you heard?

I should warn you, I’m Jonathan Christopher which means “Gift from God” and “Followers of Christ.” Soooo, I’m pretty holy.

How about you? What’s your Bible name?

Hope you enjoyed that from the dude over at Stuff Christians Like.   My name means “Father’s Joy” or “Source of Joy” and my middle name, Marie, means “bitter” or “favored one” (can you guess which one I go with?).  

When I grew up I didn’t know any Abigail’s.  Now, I can’t walk down the sunday school hallway at church without hearing a cacophony of my name be called out to girls, ages 0-5.  My folks gave us all biblical names before it was cool.  Nathan, Naomi, Micah and me, Abigail.  They were so ahead of their time.  Thanks Mom and Dad!

So, what about you?  Any Mordecai’s out there?

news and reviews

I pay attention to the news and other stuff.

Here’s my take on some news and stuff that I find interesting.  Here we go:

Is Smoking a Sin?

Tim Challies writes a thought-provoking piece on the now taboo behavior for Christians of smoking.  My two cents: smoking is not inherently sinful.  It is sinful inasmuch as it draws you and your affections from God and to smoking.  So, it will depend on each person and whether or not they are bound to it in a destructive way.  Having never smoked myself, my insights are limited.

Of course, I do think it is foolish from a health standpoint.  But plenty of things are foolish and not sinful.  I’m thinking of things like sky diving or bungee jumping or hockey or eating at Long John Silvers.

Clinton Seeks Chinese Support

Clinton calls on authorities in Beijing to keep buying US Treasuries in order to jump start the US economy.  She also avoided any sticky human rights issues.  Apparently when we’re at the economic behest of a people-squelching country we lose the right to say that people-squelching is wrong.  

So we’ve traded our collective conscience about things like religious liberty and free speech in order that the US Treasury has the funds to send converter box coupons so no American has to go without TV.  I’m more than a little concerned.

The Musical is Back!

So says Hugh Jackman, the host of the Oscars.  As I watch for the first time in a few years I am greatly enjoying the musical numbers done by Jackman and a plethora of others.  I definitely go for theatrical musical entertainment over the smutty comedy that I’ve heard in the past.  Not to say there still isn’t plenty of undesirable junk around, but still lovin’ the musical.

Finally Alive!

A new book by my pastor, John Piper, promises to be one of the most important reads outside of the Bible.  I’m only a few chapters in and am loving it for the simple and profound Gospel truths that it preaches.  If I had to write a blurb I’d say, “Finally Alive is a wake-up call for all who call themselves born-again.”  Maybe someone has said that already, if so, my apologies.

Temporary Nationalization?

At the end of this NY Times piece, Alan Greenspan, former fed chair, remarks that, “the government might be forced to temporarily nationalize some banks.”  I know Greenspan is a really smart guy, but does anyone seriously believe that if the gov’t got a hold of the banks that they would ever be given back to the private market?  This seems very naive to me.  Since when has gov’t ever willingly given up power?

 

Feedback is welcome, as always.

younger brother prodigals, older brother judgment and the third way

At Between Two Worlds, Justin Taylor points to this great article by Marvin Olasky from World magazine.

Olasky has some great insights into the younger brother/older brother phenomena, as it touches the Christian and secular world.  He says “We all know of the younger brother’s libertine living.”  But he describes the older brother’s problem as more subtle, “He is self-righteous and lacks joy.”  He goes on:

Part of the evangelical political problem in contemporary America is that much of the press and public sees us as elder brothers..  

In the realm of “social justice,” younger brothers want governmental redistribution so that everyone, regardless of conduct, gets part of the national inheritance. Some recipients of Washington’s largesse are widows and orphans, but others are younger brothers or sisters who should go home but do not because government checks allow them to keep destroying themselves. Elder brothers, though, wax sarcastic about wastrels while they overlook the needy. “Social justice” turns into either social universalism or Social Darwinism.

He analyzes journalism, higher education, and more with the younger/older brother lens.  I found it helpful.  The first time I recall reading the parable of the prodigal was as a grade school kid and I thought “What! Why wouldn’t the dad give the older brother a party too?”  I didn’t get it.

He goes on to say:

Younger brothers who perceive self-righteousness or joylessness in their elders head toward mockery. On the Comedy Network, Jon Stewart is a snarky younger brother and Stephen Colbert pretends to be an elder as he parodies FOX’s tut-tutting Bill O’Reilly. Elder brothers tend to forget that truth without love is like sodium without chloride: Poison, not salt.

What’s rare on television and in life are third brothers who, because they know deeply that the Father loves them, have love for and patience with both elder and younger brothers. Third brothers, knowing they have been forgiven, are not prideful. 

He concludes with this:

Third brothers ask pointed questions, and here are ones for each of us to answer: Am I a younger, elder, or third brother? Can we, through God’s grace, leave behind elder- and younger-brotherism?

I’ve fought against the elder brother attitude. God has ways of dealing with us “elder-brother” types.  It’s not always pretty.  But it is always loving.

So, are you an older, younger or third way-er?

a look at sorrow from the cheap seats

Depression is personal.

We (myself included) talk about “depression” like it’s one singular obtuse thing.  It isn’t.  It could mean something minor or major* or clinical*.  It is an array of many particular feelings to particular people with particular circumstances. 

I am trying to refer to it in more terms than just “depression.” Something more specific.  For me the phrase “sorrow without a cause,” seems to fit.  I also identify strongly with the word “lowly.”  Lowly is an almost perfect descriptor for how I feel when “depressed.”

I’m realizing that sorrow and lowliness will probably be a battle for me my whole life.  So I write about it because I’m learning and processing for myself and also to encourage others to deal in a Christ-like, loving way with sorrowing people. 

Here’s a glimpse from the cheap seats of me while low:

1) I feel like someone is squeezing my heart.  As though someone very dear to me has died or is in peril.  It is an overwhelming sense of grief and mourning, but seemingly unfounded.

2) I feel on the verge.  On the verge of crying all the time (which I often do), on the verge of collapsing, on the verge of being totally out of control, on the verge of going to bed and never getting up.

3) I feel alone.  

4) I feel like people don’t care.  Like I’m a freak and nobody in the Christian world wants to deal with someone like me.  Who’s got time for someone with a made-up problem like depression, when there are people really suffering out there. Quit sinning and be happy in Christ you downer.

5) I feel like holing up somewhere.  My instincts are avoid avoid avoid.  Avoid people, conversations, eye contact.  This gets a little tricky with three dependent little ones at home.

6) I feel like my life is in black and white and everyone else is living in color.

7) I feel like someone set me to s l o w-m o t i o n.  My limbs are slow, my words are slow, my thoughts are slow.  Everything sticks and needs some grease.

8) I feel very aware of my sin.  I say with David, “My sin is ever before me..”  This may be one benefit of my sorrow.  It puts me in my proper place before the gracious and holy God.  In the midst of sorrow I have no self-righteousness, no independence.  It becomes crystal clear that Christ holds me, apart from works.  Each breath is grace upon grace.

I want to be clear about why I write about this.  It’s not for personal sympathy, although sympathy is a good thing and I do long for it at times.

I share my sorrow because maybe depression has seemed diffuse and distant to you–like you can’t relate to it– and this can be the beginning of a real person’s experience for you to understand.

 Mostly I share it so that we will take care of the lowly person in our lives.  And so that we will be reminded of 1 Thess. 5: 14  ”..encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.”  (a recent fighter verse).  And to “..weep with those who weep.”  (Rom. 12:15)  

The Bible doesn’t say, weep with those who (in our estimation) have a good reason to be weeping.  Just weep with them, even if we deem their sorrow to have no legitimate cause, or even if we think their sorrow is self-indulgent drivel.  We can’t know all the factors at play.  God does; He is the Judge.

Our job is to see our brother or sister in Christ who’s hurting and know that, even in their depression, we have a lot more commonalities than we do differences.  

I Cor. 12:22-26 “On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and on those parts that we think less honorable we bestow the greater honor.. But God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it, that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another.  If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together.”

 

*Major or clinical depression has a specific diagnosis.  If you meet the criteria (for time required, etc), I would urge you to seek outside help.

a funny valentine (and yes, late)

Anyone out there know Tim Hawkins?  He’s a Christian comedian who’s actually funny.  I know, bizarre.  

Well, here’s a valentine from Tim Hawkins.

Hawkin’s is married (obviously) with 4 children, who are homeschooled.  This video reminded me of something the speaker, Tim Lane, said at the marriage retreat last weekend.  Describing himself on his wedding day he said, “It was great!  There I was at the end of the aisle waiting for my beautiful bride, thinking, “Wow, I’m great and I love me, now she gets to love me too.” 

Mr. TommyD and I chuckled last night remembering our dating days and early marriage.  We definitely fell into the category of thinking we had it all figured out.  We went to a marriage retreat after we were married one month.  We spent most of the time thinking, “We do all this stuff right already, what’s wrong with all these people?”  

Well, the Lord’s been gracious in removing that delusion.  And giving us nothing to boast in but the cross of Christ.  The cross of Christ is what keeps us married, keeps us loving, keeps us humble.

don’t worry! we still have TV!

The $787 billion dollar stimulus bill has passed the House with zero support from Republicans and seven Democrats opposing it.  

Is it just me, or is anyone else wondering why the Republicans didn’t all oppose the original stimulus that Bush put forth?  I, for one, think both bills were (are) bad news.  I just can’t help but be frustrated that the republicans didn’t take a hard stand against the spending-gone-wild sooner! 

Had they made a stink earlier and against their “own” President, they would have a lot more credibility now.  As it stands, they end up looking partisan for the sake of being partisan.  Of course, I don’t want to belittle the good work that many House republicans did in standing up against the earlier bill.  I’m glad they did.  I’m just venting here.

This bill is even more money than the first.  I thought that one was supposed to turn things around?  I guess we’ve already forgotten that.  

The AP reports:

Republicans pointed out a bevy of questionable spending items that made the final cut in House-Senate negotiations, including money to replace computers at federal agencies, inspect canals, and issue coupons for convertor boxes to help people watch TV when the changeover to digital signals occurs this summer.

Well, it’s good to know that in the midst of the economic crisis no one will be faced with a moment’s loss of TV.  That would be a tragedy indeed.  You think things are bad now, just think of the rioting we’d  see of the must-see TV-starved masses!  

We keep first things first, here in the good old US of A.

Mr. TommyD and 13 things

At the marriage retreat we were given an assignment to make a list of 25 things we appreciate about our spouse.  I thought I share some of my list with you.  I’ll do 13, because his birthday is on the 13th of April.  And you might get bored with 25.  

Mr. TommyD is a great guy, it’d be a terrible thing to keep all his wonderfulness to myself!

Did I mention I like lists?  

1) He extols and praises God in everyday speech with whomever he’s around.  

2) He leads our family in worship and when he worships God, it’s contagious.

3) He takes risks.  Not dumb blind risks, but risks that require trusting God and are for our good.

4) He goes for things.  He started his own business.  He’s good at it.  

5) If I’m exhausted from being up with the baby and he doesn’t have an early meeting, he does breakfast with the kids and lets me sleep.

6) He listens to and values my input.  He actually asks for it and wants to know what I think about things.

7) He regularly examines his own soul.  He doesn’t often accuse me of things or judge me or question my motives.  He looks for the flaws in himself before he approaches me with a problem I have.

8) He is hungry for our kids to see God in a transforming way and for them to fall in love with God and the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

9) He does most of the bills.  (that one looks small, but boy is it big).

10) He’s a great gift-giver.  He surprised me with the MacBook I’m now typing on, and for Christmas got me gift certificates to a spa (one for me and one for a friend to bring along).

11) He initiates prayer with the kids and me, everyday.

12) He’ll pick up supper when I’m worn out and doesn’t view it a deficiency on my part.  In other words, he’s gracious and understanding about what it’s like to take care of three little ones and the home.

13) He uses my hairdryer to warm up the bed sheets before I get in at night.  

Yep, I know, he’s great.  What does your spouse do that you appreciate?  Have you told them?  They might be pleasantly surprised!

post retreat crash-and-burn syndrome

Has this ever happened to you?

You go to a retreat/camp/mission trip/(some other spiritually-growth-filled time) and you have an awesome time.  You are excited about the Lord’s work in your life and thankful.  Then you get home and life seems to close in on you.  You’re trying to love people well, if only they’d be more lovable!  

I remember being in middle school and high school and experiencing this quite profoundly.  I would often return from a spiritual mountaintop experience only to sink into a funk that would take weeks to recover from.  God was gracious in those times.  I felt like I was clinging to Him with white knuckles, barely keeping myself together.  

Now I know he was holding on to me.  

Mr. TommyD and I just returned from a marriage retreat.  It’s our third year in a row to go and lead worship for the event.  I love it.  It’s a highlight of our year for many reasons.  Time away from the kids and work.  A chance to sing together, which is a rarer and rarer occurrence.  We get to fellowship with friends for longer, more focused amounts of time.  Space to evaluate our marriage and introspect.

 

That's us at the sweetheart banquet! He's good-lookin'!

This retreat met and exceeded my expectations.  Great speaker, great friends, great time with Mr. TommyD.  However, now that we’re home, I’m feeling spent.  Emotionally spent.  After a weekend where I’m supposed to come away refreshed, ready to dive into life, I feel like a need a week to recover.  You can pray for me!

Praise God, it’s not like it was when I was a teen: a complete isolating funk.  It’s more of a vague feeling of engulfment.  I’m keenly aware of my sin and it’s a bit paralyzing.  So I’m trying to move through the day embracing God’s grace, but not complacent about the sin everywhere.  

I am, by God’s grace, thankful that He continues to reveal areas in my life that are sinful and dark.  This in itself, is evidence that I am His.  He cares for His children enough to show them the places of their sin and darkness and we all have them.  If He didn’t do it, I should be concerned.  

Seeing my ugliness, should move me to the cross and Christ’s beauty.  That’s where I want to live in all my relationships: in the shadow of the cross.  Right now I feel like I’m pushing through, gutting it out, getting on with life.  The reality is, what feels like me “gutting it out,” is really Christ carrying me through.  He’s gracious, isn’t He?

Thanks for letting me use this post to preach a little to myself.  I need it.  

Have you ever suffered from post retreat crash-and-burn syndrome?  What’s it like for you?  How do you deal with it?

on being an old soul and a little sister

A few days ago I wrote a note on facebook telling 25 things about myself.  

One of them was that I’m an old soul and a little sister.  I thought I’d expound on this here.  I am the youngest of four children.  I also have always been kind of old.  It’s a bit of a cunundrum.  So here’s a list (I like lists) on being an old soul that’s a little sister:

1) As a child, I used to think my older siblings should grow up.

2) I was often called “mature” as a child, which I now think meant that I spent too much time talking to adults.  

3) I married a man almost 9 years older than me and he’s always surprised when we play board games and the “little sister” part comes out (meaning, I am competitive and always suspect people of cheating).

4) I am really looking forward to being the “older woman” in Titus 2. (How old do you have to be for that, anyway, I’m 27, so I figure by 40 I should qualify). 

5) I like things that are said to be “classic,” including books, clothes, decor.. anything really, and have an aversion to the word modern.

6) I’m known by the people I grew up with as Abby (or some simply say, “isn’t that so and so’s little sister?).  Very little sister-ish, don’t you think?  

7) I take myself seriously.  I think I’m the only one.  (thank goodness)

What are you?  Are you a youthful person who’s the oldest brother?  Or some other strange, oxy-moron-like combination?

my first meme and a tangent

My friend over at The Responsible Puppet introduced me to the concept of a meme, so I thought I’d try one here.  I’d never heard of it, so if you haven’t either, here’s a definition:

meme: n.   A unit of cultural information, such as a cultural practice or idea, that is transmitted verbally or by repeated action from one mind to another.

Basically, I’m asking you a question about a culturally relevant “thing,” and you answer and can pass on the action to someone else (or not).  A side note, I CANNOT stand chain letters or guilt letters, as they should be called.  So if the “pass on the action” part of this in anyway reminds you of a guilt-inducing chain letter, disregard it and just have fun answering a silly question.

One more thing on chain letters, I don’t believe them.  Not any of them (I don’t question the motives of the friend who sent it to me, just the originator of it).  I recently got one that was a prayer chain letter that you had to sign and pass on to 5 or 10 people and my first thought was that it was a hoax.  My two cents is, if it is a real prayer concern, don’t use chain letters as your mode of passing it around.  I just feel manipulated and annoyed.   Enough.  Here’s the meme:

List the song or songs you would sing at your American Idol audition.

You get bonus points for:

-naming multiple songs

-naming songs that might cause you embarrassment or would surprise those who think they know you.

-naming your favorite judge

-telling what you think the judges would say

I would sing Dixie Chicks, Wide Open Spaces or Queen, Find Me Somebody to Love, or Billy Joel, For the Longest Time.  My favorite judge is Simon, but I like the new Cara too.  And I think they would tell me that I was boring, lacking personality, forgettable.  But, who knows, maybe they’d think I was great?

Credits: Thanks, Scott, for the idea and format!